I’m not proud of what I said, considering the fact I’m 26 and he’s 16 but here’s the issue: even after years of introspection, questioning myself am I wrong for this or that, I simply found out I am in fact not responsible for being vitriolic towards him lately. I have a job, cant move out yet sadly, but want to so bad, so I told my mom “you buy whatever he needs, I will finance my own food etc”. Soon as I buy myself something, he either eats it, drinks it or breaks it (everytime he’s near my PC or PS5 I start trembling)
Well I wish it wouldn’t have come to this but today was some accident where a poor 17 year old got hit by a train and I told my younger brother today that I am so unlucky that a train had to hit a good kid instead of him, who never brought my family and me nothing but shame.
For even more perspective: we share a room, I cant go anywhere else, so I sleep in the same room as him. What he does is smokes in the room while I’m trying to sleep at 3 am. He failed 7th grade (he’s still in elementary school) and all he does is just trying to be like a hooligan (hes inspired by fights at football/soccer matches etc). Me? I prefer staying out of trouble unless I really have no choice but to defend myself. Now, what makes me hate him is not the fact that he eats all my stuff or drinks all my stuff, breaking my stuff is a very bad line to cross yea but the worst things are the smoking while my girlfriend is visiting instead, blatantly interrupting us while we try to study or watch a movie or he simply just doesnt let me sleep when I have to go to work in the morning (7 AM). Hes disrespectful, rude, egotistical, narcissistic and selfish, he never wants to share but takes all my stuff etc. I never taught him to be that way, I used to love him, babied him, took him to my gym to help him, took him to my breakdancing classes, wanted to do sports with him etc. But he chose bad influence and all my kindness, politeness, refusal to get physically into a fight with him and all my effort to keep my parents happy when I clean our room and take care of our home goes out the window cause he purposely makes a mess, he even puts cigarette butts on my bed and smears stuff on it, leaves a half eaten plate of food on my bed, he does everything to make me mad. So yea, I dont hate my brother cause mom and dad didnt like me more, I could give a crap about that less, I hate him cause I dont get to have peace and quiet at home, I cant relax, I cant study, I cant even have proper time with my gf cause she wants to leave everytime hes in the room making noise on purpose. Yea I need to move out but lowest rent is 450$, and its a studio apartment of like…20m². Cant move out yet so I have to endure. I wish I didnt say those mean words to him but he forced my hand so I wont ever be nice to him again. Im supposed to be mature but his behavior just throws me off and I wish he was 18 so I could whoop his ass finally.
Hi everybody! I have been looking at posts on narcs and narc abuse on here and if has really helped me out a lot. I am currently struggling with my situation and need some advice/support.
I met a narc last year, everything seemed to good to be true. Love bombing, always texting calling and taking me on dates. Everything changed when someone warned me about him out in public in front of him and who he is. This caused a conflict with us and the love bombing seized.
he would tell me that everything is okay and i can come and talk. He would set a time limit on me and kick me out after that.
he would then text me like everything was fine and we hung out again and after that he completely ghosted me for one week. He came back and texted me a week later laughing about the ghosting and acting like nothing had happened.
he continued to text me ( not like in the beginning) make plans with me, then on the day of the plans he would just ghost me. One day he would act interested the next silence.
i contacted him a month later and he acted like nothing happened. He was on a vacation and sent me a picture of another woman ( someone he allegedly met on the trip) to strike a reaction but i never gave him one. After the trip he came to my place and was extremely rude, accusing me of going on dates with a bunch of men. The next day he accused me of being an alcoholic and that he wanted nothing to do with me but said well maybe we can be "friends" then ghosted me
i assumed at this point it was over and i would never hear from him again. He contacted me on the holiday a month later acting like everything was great. We ended up hanging out a month or so later and when we hung out it went well, i thought things were going in the right direction.
after we hung out.. silence. I would try to text him and if he replied it would be very short then he just stopped replying. He ghosted me for almost three months. I thought he was done this time and of course he popped up again like nothing happened. At this point i was getting sick of if so i questioned him as to why he dissapeared and always does this. Of course he had some sob story about a injury and family member dying of cancer. I felt pity for him and he gave me an apology.. so i took him back stupidly.
things seemed to be going smooth for a couple months, of course until his family member died and his injury got better he never contacted me and was distant. Menawhile, i was there for him during the difficult time for him. He lied to me about the funeral and never wanted to chat. I was chasing him and he would always claim nothing was wrong but when i said i thought he used me when he was down he could not handle it and would always tell me he didnt care and to go away. I would get so upset i would try texting him to work it out he would barelt respond and if he did he would not be nice about it.
we did hang out a couple times after that, he would ignore me after. One day i was like hey i think you are seeing someone else, and i was like well ixam seeing someone so no problem if you are he said " buy bye good luck with your new guy stop contacting me" i was devastated and tried to get into contact with him for weeks then i just gave up and accepted it was over. He ended up contacting me a month later acting like everything was fine. He wanted to go out and have drinks i told him i would. He and i both seemed to have a great time. He ends up ignoring me again. I kept texting him trying to figure out what was wrong. He kept saying everything was fine and i said ok can we hang out again? He said maybe i was like why? He just kept saying maybe …
our last conversation we had… i said what is wrong ? He said nothing is wrong everything is fine. I asked him why he keeps saying maybe. He said " maybe but i dont want to see you right now" i said why? He saix " im just not feeling it, if i wanted to date i would" i said why did you contact me less then a week ago wanting to go out? He said i didnt.. even though he did. So i said should i just move on or what? He said whatever you want to do. So i said that he was really confusing me and asked him if he had anything more to say before i move on? My messages were turning green so i panicked he blocked me and reacted irrationally. I said " omg did you block me? My messages are not going through. Even texted him on my work phone asking what was up. And called him twice ( please dont judge me i know it is pathetic i never was this type of girl before him) so he replied and said " Ok I'll block you now" then immedietly blocked me. He has never blocked me before since I have met him he will just ghost. Is this ths final discard aka " grand finale? Did i just push him too far?
this has upset me so much its hard to even function.
